Update: Due to popular demand our staff and designers have been working hard to bring you more Obamagear products. Enjoy!
Obamanopoly is the hot new board game in Washington, Los Angles, New York, and apparently Vermont although it has not been selling anywhere else in the country. This is Chicago politics version of the classic Parker Brothers game. The traditional Chance and Community Chest have been replaced with Change and Community Organizer cards. You no longer have a chance to win money when you take your card. The cards only feature different ways to spread the wealth.
Free Parking has been replaced by Free Health Care so instead of winning money, you are required to pay 50 percent of the amount of money you have much like the Luxury Tax space. The makers of Obamanopoly have replaced the street names on the spaces with series including Unions (SEIU, UAW, and AFL), Community Organizers (ACORN – the replaces both Boardwalk and Park Place), and World Leaders (Castro, Chavez, and Ortega). The game pieces have also be revamped and include a voting machine, a Marine One helicopter (much like the gift shop model our President gave to the Prime Minister of England), a pack of cigarettes, a teleprompter, and a mini Rahm Emanuel (though that may be redundant).
Get Out of Jail, Free Cards: Two of these cards are included in the Obamanopoly game, but due to the number of Obama supporters that may need these, we are offering boxes of fifty, one hundred or a special D.C. value pack of five thousand. If you order in the next 20 minutes and use the offer code “ACORN” we will double the offer for the same price. You just have to pay the additional shipping and handling.
We are offering a limited edition autographed set of cards for the discerning collector. The Washington edition includes the signatures of Congressman William Jefferson, Barney Frank, Rod Blagojevich, Bill Clinton, New Jersey gov. Jon Corzine, and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid. We also have a special Hollywood edition featuring autographs of Chris Brown, OJ Simpson, Hugh Grant, Lindsay Lohan, Mel Gibson, and Stephen Stills.
Due to the popularity of our Get Out of Jail cards, we are offering a set of similar cards for those of you who do not quite pay all of your taxes and may want to get a job in the White House or become an elected official. Order your Get Out of Taxes Free cards. These cards have been specially developed for tax evaders and we have printed some useful excuses on the back for you to use for not paying your taxes including; “TurboTax did it,” “the tax laws are too complicated,” or my favorite from Tom Daschle the simple “I made a mistake.”
The first family have donned the covers of many fashion magazines in recent months so we decided to offer some of the most popular items so that you too can look like the Obamas. President Obama caused quite a stir when he threw out the first pitch at the most recent Major League Baseball All-Star Game. The buzz was not about his throw, but the jeans that he wore that night. Now you can own your very own pair of Barack Obama Mom Jeans. These specialty jeans fasten above your navel so no “crackin” when you bend over. Celebrities are lining up to buy these jeans. “I just love these jeans. I’ve added the suspenders for a little personalization.” said Steve Erkel and added, “I also like the fact that my pant legs don’t get wet if I am in some water.” Buy both the gathered sports jacket (sold separately) and the Mom Jeans and we will ship them for free within 10 miles of our warehouse location.
And just in time for Halloween, we are offering the unofficial White House Make Up Kit. This promises to be one of the scariest costumes available this season. Dress your munchkin like this joker and your neighbors will be forced to spread their wealth (candy). Also available in Karl Marx, Josef Stalin, Jimmy Carter, and perennial favorite Fidel Castro.
Read the original post here.