Framing the Dialogue

There has been a lot of discussion about California’s Proposition 8 and gay marriage.  A recent post that I read lamented about the “stupidity” of the majority of Californians who voted for Prop. 8.

I would suggest that folks really look at the issue in a different way.  The people pushing gay marriage seem to want more than just the same rights as married people.  I would guess that if Californians were asked to vote on a proposition worded such that gay couples could have civil unions, it would easily pass.

That doesn’t seem to be enough for some folks.  Prop. 8 was the second attempt to stop “gay marriage.”  Think of the money wasted on two ballot initiatives.  Why insist on “Marriage?”  Is it to tear down the other side’s belief in what marriage means?  I suspect so.  Most people in the U.S. don’t care if gays enjoy the same rights as married couples, but many don’t want the unions called a marriage.

I have noticed in many of these dialogues, it is not enough to get what you want; you have to destroy the other side.  I guess that is Saul Alinsky’s tactics.  Those tactics work and both sides have learned to use them effectively. 

Hopefully cooler heads will prevail.  Here is a recent quotation from Elton John in USA Today (full article here):

“I don’t want to be married. I’m very happy with a civil partnership. If gay people want to get married, or get together, they should have a civil partnership,” John says. “The word ‘marriage,’ I think, puts a lot of people off.  “You get the same equal rights that we do when we have a civil partnership. Heterosexual people get married. We can have civil partnerships.”

Well said Sir Elton John!