Framing the Dialogue

Spam De Ja Vu

Spammers spew spam surreptitiously squelching sane speech sans serious sentances…..

As long as spammers post silly spam I will have a place where I can make fun of them.  This collection is the best(or worst) of the best from Akismet’s 5,000 caught spam since my last 5,000 caught spam (that is 10,000 spam in case you did not want to do the math).  I don’t embellish or fix their spelling:

December 7, 2009:  “This is my first word” [and they shared it on Framing The Dialogue.  We are truly blessed]

December 9, 2009:  “Ooh dang i just typed a big comment and as soon as i hit post it come up blank! Please please tell me it worked properly? I dont want to write it again if i do not have to! Either the blog glitched out or i am an idiot, the latter doesnt surprise me lol.”  [my vote is that he thinks I am an idiot as he was trying to sell a “system” – no sale.]

December 9, 2009:  “I would like to put a link to your site on my blog roll if you want to do the same for mine. It would be a good way to build up both of our readerships.  thank you.”  [based on the name of his site, he sold giant cell phones.  I was not sure how visitors to my site would benefit.  He did say “thank you” though.]

December 10, 2009:  “You need think about it. Despite the emails, the overwhelming evidence showing global warming is happening hasn’t changed.  “The e-mails do nothing to undermine the very strong scientific consensus…”[this post went on for several more lines and did not lapse into a sales for muscle relaxers (their e-mail was “  The point did not seem generic as with most spam, however, even though I have posted numerous times on the subject they chose to use a post about pork barrel spending.]

December 22, 2009:  “Hello dude, nice blog Happy Holidays!” [this one slipped through Akismet probably because it was from himself.  He apparently hails from California, Dude]

December 27, 2009:  “Do you find me hot ? You can find my pics here.” [even though nobody was around I resisted temptation to see if she was really hot]

December 29, 2009:  “Good Afternoon!!! is one of the most excellent innovative websites of its kind. I take advantage of reading it every day. rocks!” [The compliment would have more meaning if the comment were not on a post from April or 8 months ago.]

January 9, 2010:  “more ocmments” [you spammers have to learn to use spell check]

February 7, 2010:  “nice post,” “interesting,” and “interesting post”  [I probably got 25 of each of these comments today.  People seem to be real complimentary on Super Bowl Sunday]

February 9, 2010:  “I was studying something else about this on another blog. Interesting. Your perspective on it is diametrically contradicted to what I read in the first place. I am still mulling over the diverse points of view, but I’m tipped heavily toward yours. And regardless, that’s what is so good about advanced democracy and the marketplace of ideas online.” [That’s why I blog…to influence people…even spammers]

February 10, 2010:  “Happy birthday!” [It wasn’t my birthday…close to my Mom’s though]

February 22, 2010:  “Worthwhile post. Well, that makes sense. This is very up-to-date web blog. I think I will share it on Facebook. Thank you for sharing your knowledge!  Mainly because at the moment, a lot of men and women are suffering from low back pain.” [very low back pain]

February 26, 2010:  “When I came upon this I felt a deep down need to kick myself in the face to make sure I wasn�t dreaming. I wandered away from my desk and walked around my department with a big smile on my face. I was in such a good state of being that I asked out this girl from the espresso bar that I think is cute. Posts like this slap all others straight in the balls.”  [I made him smile, got him a chick, and destroyed my competition…good day for me!]

February 27, 2010:  “I know you and your friends are memebers on this site Erica… Well guess what? Now they get to see you slutty naked ass! HAHAHAH” [I resisted the temptation to check out Erica’s slutty naked ass…barely]

March 15, 2010:  “yummmmy…….” [No!  Creepy.  Beware the ides of March]

April 16, 2010:  “Thank you for sharing I wish I could go somwhere.”  [Maybe over the rainbow]

April 18, 2010:  “It’s nice to lastly get a internet site where the blogger knows what they are speaking almost.”  [you made the approved comment list…almost]

April 25, 2010:  “My name is Steve and welcome to my private Porn stash.”  [I wonder if Steve works for the SEC and he used our tax dollars to accumulate his stash]

April 30, 2010:  “I am probably going to be purchasing a new desk for my home office.”  [I don’t even know what to say]

May 14, 2010:  “I’ve been visiting your blog for a while now and I always find a gem in your new posts. Thanks for sharing.”  [The “new” post was around 15 months old although it is still one of my favorites]

June 14, 2010:  “Thank you for every word that you wrote..every one of them touches my heart…” [I was actually going for the mind, but I’ll take the heart too.]

July 4, 2010:  “With all the doggone snow we have gotten recently I am stuck indoors, fortunately there is the internet, thanks for giving me something to do.”  [Note – this was posted on July 4, 2010 and at my location the ambient temperature nearly hit 90 degrees – not a sign of snow]

See you with more spam highlights in another 5,000….

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