Ralph Wiggums: Ralph is a minor character on the award winning Simpsons television show. He is noted as an oddball and for his unusual comments that often make no sense. Many people tune in just to hear the bizarre utterances of Ralphie.
Chris Matthews: Chris is a major character on the seldom-viewed MSNBC cable network. He thinks of himself as a hardball and is known for his unusual comments that often make no sense. No one tunes in to his show, but Matthews is often heckled for his bizarre utterances.
Bizarre Utterances: See if you can guess the source of these bizarre utterances. (that’s the fourth time for utterance, okay now five):
- “He’s come from a white family and a black family, and he’s married to a black woman, and they’re cool people. They are really cool.”
- “I heard your dad went into a restaurant and ate everything in the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant.”
- “Me fail English? That’s unpossible.”
- “I forgot he was black tonight for an hour…I said wait a minute, he’s an African American guy in front of a bunch of other white people…”
- “The doctor said I wouldn’t have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there.”
- “I’ve been following politics since I was about 5. I’ve never seen anything like this. This is bigger than Kennedy. [Obama] comes along, and he seems to have the answers. This is the New Testament.”
- “I bent my wookie.”
- “If we stop trying to figure out the other side [terrorists], we’ve given up. The person on the other side is not evil. They just have a different perspective.”
- “That’s where I saw the Leprchaun. He tells me to burn things!”
- “So it’s a horse in rabbit stew. An overwhelming love of these tea parties by one group of people offsets the metza-metza view from other people.”
- “You guys see Live and Let Die, the great Bond film, with Yaphet Kotto as the bad guy, Mr. Big? Um, I, eh, at the end they jammed a big CO2 pellet in his face and he blew up.”
- “And, when the doctor said I didn’t have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life.”
- “Why do people run from me?”
- “My nose makes it’s own bubblegum.”
- “I felt this thrill going up my leg.”
- “Oh boy, sleep! That’s where I’m a viking!”
- “Look at the steam in the man’s stride!”
- “Wheee! …ow, I bit my tongue!”
That was tougher than you thought.