Peter Löwenbräu Griffinis a fictional character and star of the animated series, Family Guy. Peter is the head of the family and is noted for his unbelievable schemes and bizarre, nonsensical utterances. No one with any intelligence takes Griffin’s ideas seriously and would never think of inviting him to help anchor their NEWS coverage of the Republican National Convention.
Michael Francis Moore is a fictional documentary filmmaker and star of liberal propaganda movies. Mike is the head of his amassed fortune and is noted for his unbelievable “documentaries” and bizarre, nonsensical utterances. No one with any intelligence takes Moore’s ideas seriously and yet surprisingly this StupidWhite Man was asked to participate in the coverage for USA Today of the 2004 Republican National Convention.
Bonus – Since the twins are both famous for thier excited utterances you can guess which statement is attributed to whom:
“I’m a millionaire, I’m a multi-millionaire. I’m filthy rich. You know why I’m a multi-millionaire? ‘Cause multi-millions like what I do.”
“There’s a ton of cash in this country, trillions of dollars of it. But it’s a finite amount. There is only so much cash.”
“This sucks worse than that time I went to that museum.”
“There’s a message in my Alphabits. It says, ‘Oooooo.”
“I like America to some extent.”
“”Librarians see themselves as the guardians of the First Amendment. You got a thousand Mother Joneses at the barricades! I love the librarians.”
“I read a book about this sort of thing once”
“Aww man! I hate Trivial Pursuit, it always makes me feel so stupid.”
“White people scare the crap out of me.”
“They’re sitting on the money, they’re using it for their own — they’re putting it someplace else with no interest in helping you with your life, with that money. We’ve allowed them to take that. That’s not theirs, that’s a national resource, that’s ours. We all have this — we all benefit from this or we all suffer as a result of not having it.”
“I’ll tell you what’s not cool–killing strippers. Strippers are people too; naked people who may be willing to pleasure you for a price you negotiate later behind the curtain of a VIP room. Besides, there’s no reason to kill them, ’cause most of them are already dead inside…Good night, folks!”
“we need to see these jobs as something we some, that we collectively own as Americans and you can’t just steal our jobs and take them someplace else”
“We need to change our ethic and aspire to be more Canadian-like”
“I’ve got an idea–an idea so smart that my head would explode if I even began to know what I’m talking about.”
“Nobody calls me a fizzle and gets away with it! Except for that one guy who called me a fizzle and then ran away, he got away with it. But most of the people who call me a fizzle don’t get away with it! Actually he was the only guy to ever call me a fizzle, but after today only half the people who have ever called me a fizzle will have gotten away with it!”
‘Guns don’t kill people, Americans kill people”
“A boat’s a boat but a box could be anything! It could even be a boat!”
“HOLY CRAP! I’m communticating with nature! Uh, tree, if one of you falls and no one is around to hear you, do you make a noise?”
And you thought that would be easy!