I am often torn about posts like this. My inspiration was a trip to the rest room at work and you can imagine what it may be about. Since I really don’t know most of you or why you visit FramingTheDialogue I worry that these posts will drive you away. At some point Framing will have multiple sites depending on the content; Framingthebooks will primarily be book reviews; Framingthedebate will be a forum for debates, Framingthedialogue will probably be mostly current events, and Framingthebizare will be for posts like this. Unfortunately I don’t really have enough traffic to justify spending the amount of time necessary to keep that many sites current and work full-time.
I wondered on over to fill up my water bottle (outside the rest room) and decided to give up some water first. When I walked in the odor was overwhelming. I should have retreated, but the power of suggestion to my bladder made that organ insist that I complete the task. I glanced at the two stalls and they were unoccupied and no one else was in the room. The rest room has automatic lights and they were still on so the olfactory offense happened recently. I’ll never know whether the source of that stench was even human…it did seem inhuman, perhaps even like the rot of carcasses.
Weird things ran through my head as I stumbled to rush through my job at hand; I have to breath through my mouth because the smell is so bad; wait does that mean this is going into my mouth, what if someone comes in and thinks it was me; will this smell get on my clothing; do I ever skank up the joint like that; do we really objectively smell ourselves; what if his stink is on the faucet handle and I choose the same one; how can I avoid this in the future; a match a match my kingdom for a match; I am sooo sorry that I did my sinus rinse this morning; the Women’s Room usually has a couch inside…what must that thing smell like; would a double or even a triple flush have made a difference; skunks would be in awe of this dude; if you had a black light would you be able to discern a haze; I’ve actually seen people brush their teeth in here; what if he comes in when I am in the other stall sometime?
After I escaped and was filling my bottle from the water cooler I spotted a colleague headed for the door. Being the good Samaritan that I am I warned him that it was “dangerous in there.” I quickly added that was the condition in which I had found it so he wouldn’t think it was me. He stupidly went in and was never seen again. He was probably okay, but I thought that it would be creepy to hang around to see if he came out.
It is weird knowing that someone that you work with is capable of such a crime against nature.