Framing the Dialogue

News Briefs – Volume III

Brief 1:  The Associated Press reported that a man stripped off his clothes and began to jog near the White House.  He was quickly apprehended and taken to a hospital for mental health observation.  The nude jogger posed no threat to the President, who was home at the time.  It was unclear, however, whether CNBC’s Chris Matthews would be available for his Hardball telecast or would be committed to a mental health facility for further observation.  An angry Keith Olberman was overheard saying, “That damn Matthews.  I wish that I had thought of that.  That would make Obama love me more.”

Brief 2:  The Governator used one of his famous movie quotes to put the federal government on notice.  Arnold said “I’ll be back,” but rather than returning to save the planet or some such nonsense, what he was referring to this time was coming back to the federal trough for more pork/money/bail-out.   The “Republican” governor wants some more Obama-money for his cash-strapped state.

Brief 3:  As if we were not already tired of Chicago politics and the transfer of their tactics to Washington this story may be a glimpse at our future in the nation’s capital.  It has been reported that the Chicago Police Department may be planning to eliminate its entrance exam for prospective police officers in order to attract more minority candidates.  Further restrictions cannot be far behind as the physical tests may also be eliminated to allow obese and blind people to apply, background checks may be cancelled to allow more felons to get on the force, and citizenship status will no longer be required to allow terrorists to join the force.

Brief 4:  Residents of San Francisco were shocked to discover that a population of sea lions that had been there for decades have vanished.  No one knows where they traveled or why.  I have my own theory.  We have all heard that animals have a sense when something bad is going to happen.  I think that the sea lions realized that the Bay area is represented by Nancy Pelosi, Diane Feinstein and Barbara Boxer.  Yikes!  My theory is that they relocated to Texas.

Brief 5:  The Seattle Times is reporting that the city is considering a ban on certain behaviors in its city parks.  Topping the list are smoking, spitting, sex and ten other behaviors.  I understand that nanny-staters are always after smokers and spitting is kind of gross, but I was surprised that having sex in Seattle city parks was allowed.  Does George Michael know this?  Click on the link as the discussion goes from sublime to ridiculous as the clarify that spitting while jogging is understandable.

Brief 6:  The Obama White House has found another thing to blame on Bush…everything.  It seems that the technology used by the federal government is old causing the government to be ineffective.  Yeah the reason that government is ineffective is because of old technology it has nothing to do with millions of pages of rules and the shear size of the government.  I am not sure that I want the entire federal government to be more efficient.  The good news for government workers is that new operating systems may have maj jong for them to play as most are getting tired of playing solitaire.

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