Framing the Dialogue

Morning Drive

In radio lingo the “morning drive” is the period when you may be listening to their radio station as you commute to work.  These are often the times when put on some of their most desirable shows and if they can attract enough of you listeners they can charge more for advertising. 

I recently took a job (it actually turned out to only be a job…too bad) where my morning drive lasted just under one hour.  I always had the radio on, but I generally took much of time planning my day or as the stress level increased at work I used the time to figure out how to accomplish seemingly impossible tasks.  This explains why it turned into just a job.

My morning commute, while long, was not punctuated by traffic jams, but rather country roads.  As I got more used to the route I tried some short cuts or more scenic roads.  One tree covered, back road soon became my preferred route.   On a particular stretch I noticed that many of the homes incorporated lighthouses into their landscaping.  One house’s interpretation of this theme used one that I would estimate at six feet tall. 

I should note that my commute was not anywhere near any significant body of water…a few decent sized streams, but nothing that required any land-lover to warn large ocean vessels that land is nigh.  As you know; once you notice something you start picking them out all of the time.  I started noticing many more lighthouses and counted eighteen lighthouses along my route. 

I started noticing other interesting yard art along my way including this gem featuring a politically correct donkey, Hispanic and landscaping.  I started to tally the miscellaneous eclectic art works along the way…

  • Eighteen lighthouses,
  • Eleven wishing wells,
  • Three dress-up geese (those ones made of concrete that folks dress up for the season),
  • One apple press,
  • One tipped wheel barrow with flowers sprawled about
  • Three windmills and one had a cute pair of Dutch children leaning in as if to kiss,
  • Three very large cut out white bunnies.  These were left over from Easter, but my tally was two months after the holiday so I no longer considered them holiday decorations,
  • Only one of those shiny orbs/balls.  They were very popular way back,
  • Eight wagon wheels,
  • Five cemeteries (I know these aren’t “decorations,” but until I started my tallies I never had noticed four of them before),
  • Two water pumps.  One was bright red and the other sort of rusted.  Based on their location I do not believe that they were ever functional and so I considered them lawn art,
  • One railroad crossing sign…not an actual railroad crossing, just the sign,
  • Only one planter using a large truck tire to hold in the soil.  To their credit they did paint the tire red, white, and blue,
  • One large plastic pelican planter.  I confess to not counting the numerous other water fowl filled with plants.  Please keep in mind that I was driving and keeping tally was challenging.
  • One rather unique “flower bed,”
  • Countless trolls, Madonnas, gnomes, angels, frogs, rabbits, gargoyles, etc. made of concrete (I really could not count all of them,
  • And of course numerous bird baths.

One house had the distinction of having a rather large wagon wheel, a windmill, and a wishing well in perhaps one of the smaller front yards.

Some folks proudly displayed their sense of humour although the free poop sign was near their barn and not the front yard.  My observation of a diminishing pile was evidence that the neighbors were taking them up on the offer.  If I had a garden, an old pick up truck, and neighbors further away I might have taken some myself. 

Perhaps my favorite display was again near someones barn.  I had driven past this for many years and it warms my heart to this day.  They used to have a spotlight on it at night which made for a very beautiful sight.  GOD BLESS AMERICA!

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