Framing the Dialogue

If This Then That

Thirty plus years ago this was a Fortran statement that I learned in college.  It was so long ago that I actualy used punch cards to write programs.  A horrible horrible experience.  Last week I was listening to a favorite talk radio show that is conservative.  I guess that I don’t really have to add the “conservative” as there are no liberal ones, at least that last.  An obviously liberal man called in and tried to articulate an arguement for gay marriage.  Unfortunately for him the host does not agree and over the years has shared his view on the subject many many times.  The liberal continued to argue his position never really even considering the alternate view.  I am not sure what he hoped to accomplish with his call as the host has rather strong views.  At the point of frustration he resorted to a typical liberal reaction when confronted with a reasoned opposing view.  He resorted to name calling and informed the host that he “hates gays.”

I never heard the host ever veer toward hatred of anyone except perhaps the extremists who seek to kill us all.  I was driving and started noting (using the dictation feature on my iPhone) the “logic” of many liberals.  The list got quite long and I found myself going back to it to add other items.  I look forward (as the eternal optomist) hearing your suggestions to add to mine:

  • If you are against gay marriage then you must hate gays
  • If you do not I agree with Obama’s policies then you are a racist
  • If you are against the minimum wage then you are for slavery
  • If you are against the minimum wage then you hate black kids
  • If you are against abortion then you are against women’s rights
  • If you are for low tax rates then you hate the poor
  • If you are for low tax rates then you are a corporate shill
  • If you’are for if you are for a strong defense then you are a military-industrial hawk
  • If you are a Republican then you are a racist bigoted gay hating corporate hack (AKA Red Neck)
  • If you are a Conservative then you are white
  • If you are black and a conservative then you are an Oreo or an Uncle Tom
  • If you do not believe in man made global warming then you must also believe that the earth is flat and are anti-science
  • If you are religious then you do not believe in science
  • If you believe in American exceptionalism then you suck
  • If you live in Pennsylvania then you cling to your Bibles your religion and your guns
  • If you live in the south and like NASCAR and listen to country music then you must belong to the KKK
  • If you belong to the tea party then you not only hate Obama but you hate all blacks
  • If you are a conservative woman then you must be stupid or a bimbo or a twit
  • If you are in favor of controlling illegal immigrants then you hate all immigrants and minorities
  • If you are for small government then you hate the poor
  • If you were for small government then you are a toad for corporate America
  • If you are in the military then you are a baby killer unless you are gay then you are oppressed
  • If you are for free and equal speech for everybody including groups of people collected into corporations then you must be against free-speech
  • If you believe that voters rights should be applied equally then you must be a racist
  • If you believe that Democrats cheat at elections then you are a nutjob
  • If you believe that a strong economy and a prosperous nation is the best way to have a clean environment then you must hate the environment
  • If you believe that clean energy and fossil fuels are not mutually exclusive terms then you must drive an SUV
  • If you think the Toyota Prius is an ugly status symbol for x-hippies then you are probably right.  (threw you a curve there)
  • If you think Joe Biden is articulate then you must be a Democrat
  • If you would like to actually see Obama’s college grades then you must be a racist
  • If you think George Zimmerman should get a fair trial then you must be a racist
  • If you use logic to make your arguements then you must be shouted down on all occasions

That was fun/cathartic.

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